Sometimes you get advice that doesn’t seem to make good sense.
And sometimes, that nonsensical advice turns out to be advice that you followed anyway and has given you more peace and happiness than you ever imagined.
Here are the top 3 counterintuitive tidbits I have received from people over the years that were game-changers for me:
1. Embodying non-attachment in all aspects of your life will bring you more love.
As soon as we attach to something we (consciously or not) place expectations on that thing, person or relationship. As soon as that happens, we invite disappointment. If we approach something with non-attachment, we bring to the table clarity on where we stand and what we find acceptable for that experience. We express it and let the other person decide for themselves if they want to be a part of it. That doesn’t mean that endings no longer hurt or that you love people less. But your respect for that person allows them to live their truest self without fear of blowback on them just as this approach will also do for you.
Why it works: Mutual respect and understanding will always bring you closer and cultivate greater intimacy.
2. “Fake it ‘til you make it” brings out your most authentic self.
A lot of people are spouting nonsense about how this is “inauthentic”. Let me tell you something… this was likely the #1 practical way I went about stepping into and embracing my true self. It’s one very effective method if you commit to it.
I used it to gain more confidence. I went from being a sensitive, shy child afraid of her own shadow and having often debilitating social anxiety in my 20s to a strong woman who feels confident and powerful in her own skin. And that is exactly who I knew I was and had the courage to embody with this method. Nobody can tell me nothing about how this doesn’t work and isn’t authentic.
Why it works: It gives you the courage to “try on”, with minimal commitment, that previously unexplored part of you that you don’t yet know how to fully embody.
3. Perfection will ruin your life.
As a recovering control freak, I know this well.
I had a specific way everything needed to be done and if it wasn’t done that way, it wasn’t right, so just let me do it because then it will be done “right”.
Yeah… that’s fun.
I remember the first time I let go of the need for something to be perfect (according to me)… I cannot express the feeling of liberation I had – and, to my surprise, the world didn’t end.
Here are two quick ways I deal with the itch to be “perfect” when it crops up:
Is it a goal or ideal you are trying to reach? Adopt the idea that you are already enough without that.
Is it a task you are trying to complete? Repeat after me: DONE IS PERFECT!
Why it works: Because perfect doesn’t exist. Don’t fight me on this one… #Facts.
Now over to you… share in the comments advice you have received that changed your life!
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